menial | 4 ~ I have never believed in Santa, ever. [audio]

...So, it's getting close to the end of the month again, but nothing weird seems to be happening. Or am I missing something? Anyone know if we might just be getting a reprieve or something? Or maybe I just shouldn't look the gift horse in the mouth.

['Because I don't believe in the Malnosso being Santa Claus to us.'

However, that's not the main purpose for this post; instead, he goes on with a filter he worked for a while on. Ideally, Asakura won't suspect it at all.]

[filtered to Shiki, Minato, Winry, Rise, SOS Brigade members who have interacted with him before, and other close-enough CR (PM me if you're not sure) // 55%]

Yo. If you guys have seen a girl with blue hair who smiles a lot, by the name of Ryoko Asakura... Well, I guess I've got something to ask of you if you do attract her attention, but I'd rather not put it on the journal, so please talk to me if you've met her.

['So what if that makes it seem like I might have a crush on her? Better that than someone hacks it and realizes that I know what Asakura is.']

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[Gift?! She heard gift!]

There were some horses at the ranch, but they didn't give Yotsuba any gifts! Why?

...What?

[Having totally forgotten his wording with the business of the filter.]

Gift horses! ...Maybe it's the horse that comes in a gift box? Surprise, happy birthday, here's your horse!

[Gifts man. Gifts.]

...That's probably the original context, but I doubt boxes are involved.

Turns out when people used horses to do everything, they were a lot more valuable and of interest.

So no boxes. Okay. The horse can come in a letter then. Ohhh! Or a big package and you need to assemble it like a bookcase! Flat-pack horse!

[...]

Everything? [Already thinking of all the things people could use horses for.]

Yeah. That's probably right.

['Ask the Trojans about how that horse thing went over, though.']

Well, almost everything...

Were horses used for watching TV and buying pot noodle from the store?

Well, Yotsuba, this was a time before TV. So no to the former.

The second one, yeah, probably.

Wow, horses were really useful. Used for more than just riding. [...] What's a repreeve?

['My contribution to the educational system.']

It's a break.

Take a break, enjoy some ice cream, enjoy life!

[But anyway, applying this new found knowledge to Kyon's message.]

We're getting a break from weird stuff, or you're missing something. Yotsuba hopes you find it.

That's a good motto. You could be in an ad, Yotsuba.

Don't worry. I'm not looking for anything.

I could?! Ohhh... Yotsuba might become a star. Yotsuba should do ads for people!

[And so!] Did you lose something, like Kyon lost something, but he's not looking for it? If you talk to Yotsuba then Yotsuba will find it for you, no charge! Yotsuba won't even call you and say "Hi! Take part in our surv... Serving? Answer some stuff!"

Take a break, enjoy some ice cream, enjoy life. [...] How's that?

It's good. Works for me, though you can leave the part starring me out. And you can ask Kujikawa for more tips.

Ohhh, okay, Kyon doesn't need to star. What's a Kujikawa?

[...

...]

Oh, Rise! She makes good cheesecake, yum.

She also happens to be good with ads.

She is? How's that work, is Rise an ad?

She was in that business at home.

Ohhh, she was in business! Did she have lotsa business cards to hand out so people knew who she was?!

I bet she was so good, she didn't need business cards.

You can be like that!? Wow, so good you don't need business cards?! How?!

If everyone already knows your name, well, that's just called having fame.

['Rhyming couples are my game.

Apparently.']

Rhyming game! Name rhymes with fame which rhymes with same, Kyon's turn!

[Suddenly, subject change whiplash.] Rise has lots of fame~♪ 'Cos everyone knows her name~♪

Rhyming game? I'm sorry, but I'm not taking the blame.

Huh, not taking the blame? Did you do something bad? ...Rhyming game.

Blame rhymes with Yotsubame.

[Voice]

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