4 ~ I have never believed in Santa, ever. [audio]

[menial]

...So, it's getting close to the end of the month again, but nothing weird seems to be happening. Or am I missing something? Anyone know if we might just be getting a reprieve or something? Or maybe I just shouldn't look the gift horse in the mouth.

['Because I don't believe in the Malnosso being Santa Claus to us.'

However, that's not the main purpose for this post; instead, he goes on with a filter he worked for a while on. Ideally, Asakura won't suspect it at all.]

[filtered to Shiki, Minato, Winry, Rise, SOS Brigade members who have interacted with him before, and other close-enough CR (PM me if you're not sure) // 55%]

Yo. If you guys have seen a girl with blue hair who smiles a lot, by the name of Ryoko Asakura... Well, I guess I've got something to ask of you if you do attract her attention, but I'd rather not put it on the journal, so please talk to me if you've met her.

['So what if that makes it seem like I might have a crush on her? Better that than someone hacks it and realizes that I know what Asakura is.']

Comments

[weaponry]

Certainly not pettings.

[ Kyon, you did a fantastic job of not adding things. But, Tenten figures she should bring this up now and complain she was shifted by those no good Malnosso! ]

[menial]

[Kyon coughs in a manner which, to a sensitive mind, would probably convey a certain amount of disbelief.]

...Certainly not.

[weaponry]

[ She notices that and sighs. ]

Hey. Don't let what happened from a shift give you the wrong idea. A conscious, aware, Tenten that's not being brainwashed would never allow that to happen. Do you want to know where that kangaroo outfit went?

[menial]

['It was so ... overwhelming, though.']

Well, you had recognized that you didn't even need it in order to be a kangaroo, I believe.

But yes. It would probably be fairer not to pets--pester you about it.

[weaponry]

I recognized it was fucking ridiculous the moment that shift was over. [ She wore a paper bag over her head for three days in shame. ]

Uh, thanks. I guess.

[menial]

['She is not the kind of person I want to pets---... piss off, so...']

Right. It could've happened to anyone at all.

[weaponry]

Anyone that's a pisces at least. [ At least someone finally agrees. ]

[menial]

['Why stick to fish when the eventual result is a kangaroo, though?']

Yeah. I guess it's just your sad lot to be teased by people about it regardless of blame.

[weaponry]

Well, lucky for me, people haven't mocked me for it. I think they know better than that. [ Oh, yes, they should know better than that. ]

[menial]

What would, hypothetically, happen if that were to occur?

[weaponry]

Hypothetically, the person would be stuck listening to me until they agree. [ "Polite" language for: ASS-KICKING IS IMMINENT. ]

[menial]

...I see. Hypothetically, would it be words doing the talking the whole time?

[weaponry]

Well, it depends if they get it or not. [ She's not above using comical violence to convince others! ] I think they should get it, though. I mean, everyone is sympathetic to a shift.

[ ooc: Sorry about the lateness! DW has been failing me for the past couple of days! ]

[menial]

...Well, that's good to know. As long as they get it sooner or later, no need for anything except words, I hope.

[ooc: np!]

[weaponry]

Sometimes hope can only get a person so far but most of the time it does the trick.

[menial]

Well, I for one won't leave it to hope. Even if I get a dog, I will refrain from mentioning pets in your presence.

[weaponry]

You know, Kyon, you're a really really smart man. [ There's an implicit, praiseworthy grin in her tone. ]

[menial]

[He grins back, a little. Still dryly:]

It's true, if there were more people like me, the world would be a better if lazier place.

[weaponry]

Well, a little lazier is something I wouldn't mind compared to my vigorous schedule and teammates back home.

[menial]

Oh, yeah? What are those like, by the way?

[weaponry]

I'm afraid that type of thing is best left undisclosed for your sanity. It has to be seen to be believed, honestly.

[menial]

Believe me, I take it as a welcome surprise that a girl even thinks about sparing my sanity. I won't ask again.

[weaponry]

Good, good. You'll know them when you see them though. Their names are Rock Lee and Might Guy, so just remember that. It's the most tame thing about them.

[menial]

Are they in fact here...?

[weaponry]

Nah, they aren't here. None of my teammates are. [ She's actually glad about this and portrays it pretty well in her facial expression and tone. ] It's a bit frustrating and I miss them, but, if they're somewhat safe back home and don't have to deal with the village and the Malnosso and all that, then who am I to complain?