menial | 10 ~ comparing those worlds to this boring, normal life [audio/picture]

['Well. It sure got cold pretty fast, huh? Which means that I'm rapidly approaching the one-year mark, so I should really be proud. Or something. After burrowing myself away to avoid complications from refugees, my antisociality has reached a certain limit.

Unfortunately, I also have nothing to contribute beyond the observation about the weather which I already blithely used up there! Not that people can read my thoughts, but if they could, they'd find out. Well, they'd find out a lot of things. But who would want to anyway? It would just go on and on without any point.

Anyway, I guess I'll poorly disguise my attempt to see who's up for a random conversation with some kind of opener. Hey, if I were at home, this would be a mind-scarring Omegle session or something. At least I'm pretty sure I won't run into the usual problems stranger-chatting over the journal.'

...and so:]

So I found this in a book the other day.

Maybe this doesn't work as well over the journal, but I thought it was cool, anyway. Or at least different from discussions about fire and eternal suffering, continued kidnapping, disappearance, reappearance, cross-dressing, and so on.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Except I started dating Haruki first, and wasn't really given the heads before I dived in to date Haruhi. What, do you think I should have just not dated someone I was in love with even if we ended up not being forever material?

When it comes to her, or him, or either of them, yeah, maybe. It's called consideration for her and the whole world, you know? I don't know what you knew at the time, but if it was anything, you might've thought about that. Don't tell you can't do what even I can do.

But you don't think it's a two way street? And that she had "no clue" about my obvious desires to settle down? That she shouldn't have had any consideration back?

Look, that's all fine, but you knew Haruhi. If you're going into a relationship with Haruhi, you probably know that you're going to be the one who's "responsible." I'd think you should be able to guess that part. At least, that's what happens with my Haruhi. Who knows about Haruhi here? Who knows about this Haruki? I'm guessing you knew them when they were pretty much like that, though. You get what you see with her. If you had to hold off until your feelings were clear, until you knew you could actually say "I'm not going to leave, no matter what, even if she's this ridiculous god figure and even if I know everything that she doesn't, or even if I want kids, apparently, and she doesn't," well, maybe that's what you had to do.

Which is obviously pointless for you now, so whatever. The point is ['What is the point again?'] -- well, I guess the point is that I can't fix any part of this mess, so you don't have to ask me about how she's doing and how we're getting along. I'm not her "Ed" here, neither from her perspective, I'm guessing, nor from mine.

What!? Don't pull that on me! I'm not saying you're "her Ed" or anything! I'm asking you how you're getting along because you come from the same world! Of anybody here you are one she is bound to no matter what. She will leave here and remember you. You're tied to her life no matter what happens here, and that's important. No matter what you say or what happens you are important to her. That's why I'm asking! It's important!

Yeah, sure.

...No, I buy it. For weird reasons and sentimental reasons.

But if you want my honest opinion, she's way closer with all these others. She has a problem, she's not gonna come to me with it, unless it involves testing an alarm. It's you, or Misaki, or Arisato, or blah blah, list goes on.

...And that's fine.

That might change. People come and go. They'll remember, or they'll forget. But people from home will always be in each other's mind.

Maybe it'll change, yeah. But that's how it is right now. And that's how it's been for ten months here.

All right... thanks for letting me know, I-

[Well actually she's not sure what she wanted out of that. She just... wanted to know. That they're okay. That at least they're not at odds.]

[So reasonably enough, he just asks...]

You what?

I- I dunno.

You don't know how that makes you feel?

That's not it!

Okay, well... what is it, then?

I'm just grateful you let me know, okay?

[She's concerned about them, and even though they may not be close now that could all change.]

10 ~ comparing those worlds to this boring, normal life [audio/picture]

[voice]

[voice]

[voice]

[voice]

[voice]

[voice]

[voice]

[voice]

[voice]

[voice]

[voice]

[voice]

[voice]

[voice]

[voice]