menial | 1 ~ when did I stop believing in Santa Claus? [audio/action]

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1 ~ when did I stop believing in Santa Claus? [audio/action]

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[A teenage boy is extricating himself with some difficulty from having been dumped, or appearing, in the middle of the fountain in the center of the village. He's muttering to himself and clambering out. He's dressed in the generic-enough North High uniform, but of more interest may be what he's saying -- which is picked up by the split-open journal next to him.]

...Really, Haruhi? After all of that, I'm in some other time and place again?! Oh, boy. She really just doesn't stop... Where the hell is it this time?

[Once he gets up and brushes himself off, he can be found staring with slightly less bewilderment than you might expect at his surroundings.]

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Yeah, same name! And you know what, it's a hit! My Spreading Excitement All Over the World with Haruhi Suzumiya has lived up to its name, and it's got tons of members, tons of insight, and a lot of sway! Power and resources and- and- And none of you guys were there! [...He's going off topic, and advancing on Kyon again.]

Koizumi's never been here! His cousin was once but- Yuki's never been here - not the real one, from my memories, and even the alternates didn't last! Mikuru's never been here! And even you- This is only the secon- third? Whatever! It's been years!

[But as soon as she finishes, she folds her arms and, well, pouts. She still doesn't know how to react here and it's pissing her off]

'I listened to all of that calmly. Mostly calmly. 'Many ways to bring excitement to people'. 'Tons of members, tons of insight, and a lot of sway?'

Yeah, maybe that was one of Haruhi's dreams. But somehow it's just not the same as the Brigade that I signed up for. I honestly don't know if it's better or not. Helping people? The SOS Brigade only rarely manages something like that. Most of the time we just do what we please, and save the universe mostly from ourselves. So maybe it's better?

But all I can say is what I feel in my heart, that if it's not us, it's not the real SOS Brigade. All of us. Even Koizumi. I'll punch him in the face, but he can still be there. What is she trying to say? That she succeeded without us? That we're all replaceable? Does she really believe that?

Is that actually true? Or is she actually just upset that we weren't here and that she needed to make some other version of the Brigade to make up for it?

It reminds me of those stories where a soldier goes off to war and is presumed dead, so his fiance marries another man, but it turns out he was a prisoner of war all along and comes home. Not that I watch that kind of movie. My aunt loves that kind of thing, though.

Where was I? Probably just trying to distract myself, right? How am I going to treat it anything like the old clubroom without Nagato sitting by the window, or Asahina-san cutely serving tea, or Koizumi smiling that damned smile at me while proffering the board games?'

[A rather lengthy pause later, he sighs.]

It's hardly our fault that we haven't been here when we have no idea how to get here. If it's your brigade, you can do whatever you want with it. I'm not arguing.

[His tone doesn't speak agreement, though: it has clear overtones of "we'll have to agree to disagree".]

[Keiichi just sighs from his position. Honestly he hadn't had expectations out of this but he had hoped it wouldn't turn badly... He's not sure how the situation is right now, but he can tell that she's upset and maybe confused as well... And Kyon probably feels the same. Maybe he should say something, but he's not sure what to say. On one part he sides with Haruhi, for many reasons, on another he tries to imagine Kyon's position, but is this really even about sides? Probably not.]

Good, because you have no right to!

[ ... ]

...You do, however, have to right to object to jointing the new SOS-Brigade. You get that same chance I gave everyone else in it when the conversion happened.

[she pulls out a chair and takes a seat, still with her arms folded. An almost defensive position. There's a light pause before-]

You'll have every right to object once you go home.

'That's a rather drastic step, isn't it? I suppose I should take it as an encouraging sign that Haruhi is granting me any rights whatsoever, even my rights under the Geneva Convention.

Of course, there's another big question here. How she reacted to all the supernatural stuff around here. If our big secret is even still a secret. If this SOS Brigade also knows about that secret. All of that. It might be my best hope of getting home from this place, one way or another. Because, in spite of whatever else I can or can't deduce yet, this place and this Haruhi are not my home and my Haruhi. As always, I need to get back to there. I need to find out how it can be done again.

And by the way, don't misunderstand when I say "my Haruhi." I'm looking at you, Koizumi. The possessive is used in a decidedly unpossessive way, so don't even get started on that.'

No need for that. You're the leader.

[Not that he sounds like he's undergone any transformation of heart. He's still agreeing to disagree.]

Good.

[And she smiles at that. As it should be.]

'Hm. Then that's that. For now.'

Well then, mind telling me what all of these changes are?

[And now he waves at Keiichi]

Keiichi, explain.

[He nods at the order. Maybe she would be better for explaining "changes" but whatever, if she thinks he can do it he'll just assume the Brigade Kyon knows is the same structure as it was at first.]

I assume the way the Brigade worked in your world is the same as it worked here at the beginning. Based on that, as I said, we now work as a support group, answering to people's SOS messages and requests of any kind to the best of our abilities. We aren't an odd job group we aim to assist in self-improvement or interpersonal matters.

Examples of what it could be? Adaptation to the new environment could be one, we get many people from worlds different from ours in which there isn't even electricity, so it can be quite a cultural shock for them to be thrown to Luceti, besides the shock it is by default. Another would be help people to deal with traumas, though if it's too serious of an issue we just refer them to Paprika, ah, she's a professional therapist that's here and thus better qualified for it.

Besides that we still are the flagship of Luceti in terms of entertainment, so we will still organize events and the like according to relevant dates. [Not that there's anything planned at the moment but he assumes they will do something for Christmas or New Year like always.] Besides that the other most obvious change is the roster, but I'm not sure if that is bond to undergo new changes now or not. And you'll meet everyone else at the next meeting anyway.

[He has no idea if Kyon had a special position in the Brigade and if so if Haruhi will want him back on it. Which could alter the roster and current positions.]

I think that's all, in general terms.

'Of course, I tuned out halfway through.

Actually, I just wish I did. But this is kind of important. So I listened pretty carefully to try and discern what lay behind it all. Was this some other test laid out by someone? An SOS Brigade with a real purpose besides its internal perpetuation?

...Seems like the purpose is still not quite one hundred percent defined, but it's some kind of more open social club. Which, again, isn't a bad thing. But our SOS Brigade was proudly insular, and took over subjects in a feudal manner only.

Not to mention the matter of "the roster." I'm looking forward to that one. This guy in front of me, despite his Koizumiesque tendency, doesn't seem like an abnormal superhuman in any sense. Of course, I suppose I wouldn't find out with Haruhi around.' [Assuming things work the same here, of course.]

Out of curiosity. How expanded is this roster?

[And now Haruhi sounds off, looking at the ceiling and counting on her fingers:]

Stand in vice chief is that guy right there, Keiichi Maebara. the deputy vice chief is Mikage. German-like, has word-magic, sort of gay. As for the normal members there's Leon, who made the teleporting units we're responsible for, Uriko who's been with us forever, Xion, Oswald [...] "the Lucky Rabbit" [That comes with air quotes] - he insists, technically this thing named Pommy, but he's inconsistent, same for this woman named Grune... and then there's Hiccup, pretty recently Alphonse Elric, Azusa Miura, and some loser named Ayumu who I keep around because he's got nothing better to do and needs some direction, being a zombie and all.

[A beat] Naturally, those are the members in Luceti right now. given this village's turnover rate, we've naturally had a lot more over time, but they've since gone home.

... Only sort of?

[You had to add that as a description, didn't you?]

You forgot to mention that Oswald is a black rabbit with pants and that Alphonse always wears a huge metal armor.

[Technically he IS the metal armor but, whatever.]

And... I don't know what Pommy is supposed to be.

[Hey, she added special descriptions to the most out-standing ones of them, why not add the rest? The others... Are apparently normal. Apparently.]

'...Can we just go back to Santa Claus, please? Out of every fifty phonemes I processed during that whole list, fully forty-nine made no sense. What the hell is a teleporting unit, word-magic, some thing called Pommy that nobody knows what it is, a zombie, rabbits with pants--

I give up.'

Forget I asked.

'One thing's for certain, though: she hasn't been kept from the supernatural. That, or something in the water here has made everyone stark raving insane, in which case I think I'd better try and get one of those butter knives on my person as soon as possible.'

Whatever. You'll probably like Ayumu.

Well, now that the Brigade stuff has been sorted out, maybe it's time to tell him about Luceti as a whole? I didn't explain much before he mentioned you and I brought him here.

[He looks at both though it sounds as if he's only talking to Haruhi.]

You got any specific questions?

'My most pressing question is how you get out, but they clearly don't think it's possible, so, unlike a movie protagonist, I won't ask.'

Not really. I just need to figure out what to do next.

The Welcome Center, I guess...

And a throughout read through the guide as well, though there are parts we could explain ourselves before he reads them. You should also get a place to stay as well, though the Welcome Center is prepared for it if you want to settle there temporally at first.

'Yeah, I don't know if I'm ready to settle anywhere not temporarily. In fact, I'm pretty sure I'm not. Not at home, either.'

Right. What's the most important thing?

Wandering around.

[So helpful Haruhi. Keiichi stares at her for a second before he sighs and stands up.]

'Kay, I'll accompany you to the Welcome Center and tell you on the way there. On the top of my head the wings are the most important thing as I told you already. I suppose that knowing that if you die you will return to live again after a week is important to know too.

[Just don't go around dying. Let's see, he already explained about the time thing and the part about people from from other times and such.]

Also... Don't make too many big plans for the end of the months, just in case something screws them over.

'Oh, of course. If I die, I'll return to life again. Yup, I can't see any way in which that might be a fundamentally bizarre sentence requiring a little more explanation than that!'

Something like dying for a week?!

K-keiichi!

[After all, it is true, but not something she would throw around so casually. She scrambles to her feet]

No. Not that like. Nothing like that- people dying isn't exactly common and it's not like there's a ton of psychopaths around these days or anything- just-!

[Her cool is lost, how does she salvage- inhale, exhale]

Anyway, forget it, I'll take him there.

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