menial | 2 ~ in truth, this sort of silly question holds no real significance for me [audio/action]

['End of the month. Check. Strange things appearing for no reason. Check. This would be, if I had the choice, the part where I run and hide from the experiment. However, the content that appeared is just bizarre.']

[audio]

"A fart will follow you into the car, ruining your date."

This sounds like one of those bad Western comedies. You know, the ones with lazy slacker heroes who're forced into wacky adventures...

['Wait, if I had to honestly describe my own life... As they say at home, the eye wax laughing at the snot*.'

And so he decides to leave it at that.]

[action]

[Today, then, Kyon will be found wandering around in the Welcome Center and the plaza, annoyed, because, quite according to the horoscope, his keys are missing.

'This does not bode well. Well, I guess "against all odds, you will accomplish a basic task" isn't ominous so much as simply insulting. But "you will have a chance encounter with romance today so take a bath, for God's sake"... That one could be problematic. In all kinds of ways.']

[*ooc: Japanese idiom, something like "the pot calling the kettle black".]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

... Does this place even have cars?

[This is totally the part that matters. He's too cool to talk about farts.]

I was wondering about that as well, actually.

From the look of these things, they're probably just someone's weird idea of a joke anyway. No point wondering about them.

They might be a joke, but I'm a little suspicious.

Well, even if they were for real, what do you think they mean? Should we just take them literally?

I'm having trouble finding a metaphorical reading of the fart one.

Considering what kinda guys have brought us here, it's probably a weird one. Or, maybe only the bit about the car is metaphorical.

What's a car a metaphor for? Traveling? I doubt I'm headed anywhere...

It could be something that looks like a car! Or a carriage, maybe!

...A carriage doesn't actually sound that unlikely.

I dunno. Do we have anything here that can actually pull a carriage either?

I thought there were animals somewhere or other, right? If not, I suppose there's always conscription.

... Well, even if that part works, it doesn't really explain the bit about going on a date.

...That's not all that unimaginable, surely.

['Or have people I don't even know already come to that conclusion about me?']

Weeeell, I don't see why anyone'd wanna go on a date when they're stuck here. Just saying.

Maybe so, but it seems like plenty of people do.

Then let's look at it this way: are you gonna go on a date now you've read that?

Who knows what the future holds? I concede that it may not be likely, though.

Well, whatever. Just stay away from any carriages and girls for a while and you'll be fine!

You got any more predictions like that?

Eh. They're mostly mundane other than that.

Those are the ones you should be worrying about then! They probably mean something really bad if you look at 'em right!

"Your keys are missing"?

[... Okay, that seems pretty straightforward. Still, he's gotta find something bad in it! Thinking...]

It's the 'keys' to that 'car' from before! So, you're gonna be stuck inside there with something nasty! [Like whatever the fart is supposed to be! His logic is flawless, okay.]

Do carriages even have keys?

... Maybe they have something like those bars they put on gates? But, like, smaller.

[voice]

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